


How Do You Become One Again

by Lilsciencequeen



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe - Stripper/Exotic Dancer, Brothels, Childhood Friends, Developing Relationship, F/M, Lost River AU, Minor Angst, Strippers & Strip Clubs
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-31
Updated: 2019-09-01
Packaged: 2020-07-28 06:25:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,092
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20059498
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lilsciencequeen/pseuds/Lilsciencequeen
Summary: In a town full of secrets, Fitz soon finds out that his neighbour might be hiding one of the biggest whilst Jemma does everything to keep her family alive.// A FitzSimmons Lost River-AU





	1. This Is The Sin That I Will Confess To Release Myself From Consequence

**Author's Note:**

> So I have had this fic planned for well over a year now, with the first two chapters drafted and since I have, I thought why not? Might as well finally post it. This is something slightly different from the other fics that I've read and I'm going to see if this style works for me, so thank you for deciding to come on this journey into mystery with me! 
> 
> Accompanying playlist can be found [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/45QSLYl12ZCc8M2NKm8YvU)

“Do you have to go, mummy?” her daughter asked from the bed, and Jemma froze, not wanting to turn around and face her daughter. The words were soft and small, filled with such sadness that it broke her heart hurt. She let out a sigh, and looking up, she met her daughter’s eyes in the mirror.

The girl was wrapped up in several blankets, several pillows propping the girl up. She was also clutching an extremely battered teddy bear. Her blue eyes were full of tears and sadness and it was those that prompted Jemma to turn around and walk back over to the bed. She sat down on the end, and reached over, brushing at her daughter’s hair, pushing back the unruly curls. “I do monkey, but I’ll be home before you wake up, you know that, don’t you? I’m always home before you wake up.”

Her daughter didn’t answer, instead she just remained silent and Jemma sighed. “I know you don’t like me working, but I have to, but I promise you I’m going to be okay, I’m going to be safe. And if you’re a good girl for Daisy tonight, I’ll get you ice cream tomorrow.”

Normally ice cream would make Peggy smile, her eyes twinkle and light up like Christmas had come early but not tonight. “What about the money?”

Jemma shook her head, she wished nothing more than to protect her daughter from the world, the hell that they lived in. But she couldn’t. She knew a lot of went on in the town, just how much of a bad area that it was. She knew of her mother and her money issues. She also knew that Jemma hated her job, that she worked down in the local club. But she didn’t know everything. She didn’t know just how bad the town was, just how rife addiction and violence were. She didn’t know just how little money Jemma had, how her own mother hadn’t had a proper meal in nearly a fortnight now. She also, and this was what Jemma was most thankful for, didn’t know what a job at the club actually entailed. And she hoped that her daughter would never find out just what exactly she did for her job and if she did Jemma hoped that by that time, they had long left the town, living the life that Peggy deserved. 

“You don’t need to worry about money,” Jemma whispered, hoping that she could convince her daughter that everything would be okay. “We’re going to be okay, we’re always going to be okay. And I’m sorry, I have to go but you know Daisy’s here if you need anything.”

Peggy nodded, and Jemma pressed a kiss to her forehead. “I love you mummy.”

“I love you too, and I’ll see you in the morning, okay monkey?”

Peggy nodded, and allowed her mum to tuck her back into the bed. Another kiss was pressed to her forehead before Jemma left the room, heading into the lounge.

Daisy was there, collecting the dishes that had been left there since dinner several hours earlier, piling up the bowls. She stopped when she saw Jemma, already sitting down on the sofa and sliding on her shoes. The two women remained silent for a moment, and it wasn’t until she had fastened the buckles of her heels that she looked up, making eye contact with Daisy. “She’s worrying about money.” She didn’t want to tell Daisy, she didn't want to add another worry to their ever-growing piles of worries, but she knew that this was something that she could keep secret. Daisy needed to know this if they where going to work out what to do next, how to help Peggy before she worried any more than she already was. She was just five years old, she shouldn’t be worrying about money, or what her mum did, even if some of it was understandable and justified. But at the end of the day, she didn’t want her daughter to worry about anything.

That was her job as Peggy's mother.

To worry about everything and let Peggy live a care-free childhood full of happy memories and laughter.

“She is?” Daisy asked, slightly confused. She had never heard Peggy mention anything about the money issues that they were currently having. She and Jemma always kept it between the two of them, not discussing the matter when they knew that Peggy was close by.

Jemma nodded, sighing. “I’ll ask Ward, see if I can work Sunday night.”

“No,” Daisy shook her head, refusing to let Jemma work another night if it were possible. “I’ll go out tomorrow, see if I can grab some cash.”

“It’s too risky Daisy,” Jemma protested, turning her back and standing up, grabbing her coat and putting it on. “An extra night won’t hurt me, and besides, we need the money.”

“Jemma,” Daisy tried to protest, but it was too late, Jemma was already heading out of the house, the door slamming behind her as she made her way to the taxi that was waiting outside.

***

Really, Fitz didn’t want to be here, at the club. If it weren’t for the fact that it was Hunter’s birthday, he wouldn’t be here.

Because, really, it wasn’t a club. Not really. It was a strip club, but one that doubled as a brothel, ran by a one Grant Ward, who also ran most of the town at this point. No, he ran the whole town. Pretty much everything and everyone was under his control, and there was nothing that no one could do about it, nothing that the could do to stop it. They all just accepted the hell that they were living in.

“Want a drink?” Hunter asked, knocking him out of his thoughts and bringing him back to the present, back to the club. The music was blasting, playing some suggestive indie pop song that he had heard plenty of times before but never really paid attention to.

Fitz shrugged, looking at the menu that was scrawled on the blackboard behind the bar. None of the drinks seemed that appealing. But it was Hunter’s birthday, and he hadn’t come out the past number of times Hunter had asked him to come out, so he knew that he had to do this for his friend. “I’ll buy them, you get us a seat.”

Hunter gave him a smile and slapped him on the back before shouldering his way through the club, already busy even though it was still the first hour that it was open. It took him several minutes to even get served but once he had both beer, he made his way to where Hunter was already sitting, at one of the tables next to the stage, the first act already well through their performance.

There was something familiar about her, something that he couldn’t place his finger on, but he pushed the thought from his mind as looked at Hunter, the other man’s gaze flickering around the room. As though he were looking for someone.

Then it hit Fitz, just why they were here.

They weren’t here for the club, to take advantage of the women who worked here like everyone else did. They were here for Bobbi. Hunter’s on-again off-again girlfriend. At this point, Fitz wasn’t sure what their relationship status, but since Hunter had dragged him out here tonight and he was now looking frantically around the room, if he had to guess, he would say that it wasn’t good.

The music changed, the new song more suggestive than the last one, and the lights dropped, turning a bright red and all the attention focused on the woman that was on the stage closet to them. The woman had soft brown hair, in loose curls around her face and they feel down to her shoulders. Her lips where a blood red, and her eyes were smoky. She was wearing more than the other dancers but that wasn’t saying much. She took to the pole, her back arching as she began her routine and Fitz’s attention was so focused on her that he missed Hunter’s snort.

It took him a moment to drag his attention away from the woman, at his friend who was speaking to him now, a smirk on his face and his eyes twinkling with something, and that something made Fitz uneasy. It looked as though Hunter was planning something and he had to ask Hunter to repeat himself.

Another snort and then he spoke. “Do you want a night alone with her? Just the two of you?”

Fitz shook his head, that to him was one step too far. Buying a night with a woman, buying sex, it wasn’t something that he could do. There was nothing right about it and even thinking about taking part in it, it made him sick to his stomach.

Hunter shrugged, and grabbed for one of the bottles, bringing it to his lips and taking a drink. “Suit yourself. If you change your mind, or see something else that you like, let me know.” He gave a knowing wink and then stood up, making his way through the club to the tall blonde in the far corner.

Bobbi.

Fitz sighed, leaning back in his seat and grabbing his own bottle. He wondered how long he had to remain here, how long it would be before he could sneak out and head back home. He finished his drink, setting the empty glass down on the table as the woman on the stage finished her routine, and when she looked up, she met his eyes and that’s when he remembered who it was.

Jemma Anne Simmons.


	2. Who's In The Shadows? (Who's Ready To Play?)

She didn’t notice him at first, the adrenaline that had kept her going through her routine still coursing through her veins but when she did see him, she froze. Blue eyes that she knew so well were staring up at her, full of shock and confusion, as if wondering what she was doing up there of all places.

Swallowing hard, she collected herself, and turned and left the stage, knowing that she had to continue with her night. It was her job after all. She couldn’t let herself get distracted by him of all people. Someone she hadn’t seen for years now.

He wasn’t important.

He might not even be there for her.

He was just here for the night, for the entertainment that the Hive Club provided, so why should she let him occupy her thoughts. She had more important things to worry about.

But no matter how hard she tried; she couldn’t get him out of her mind. The image of him sitting there, it was burnt into her brain. And she knew, she just knew, that he was horrified by what had happened to her.

What she had become.

Horrified by the fact that she was no longer the girl that he had grown up with, who he had spent nearly two decades getting to know.

And she wasn’t the person who had been his best friend up. Not anymore.

That had all changed that fateful night six years ago, when a friendship had been ruined with a simple open window. He hadn’t come to see her after that night, and by the time she had gained the courage to go back and speak to him, weeks later, it was too late. It was far too late. So, she had hidden from him, scared to tell him what had happened. And even though he was, had been, her best friend, despite the fact the two of them had grown up together, inseparable, this wasn’t something that she could just dump on him. He hadn’t signed up for this.

He shouldn’t have to feel obliged to help, so the secret remained just that.

A secret.

And as the time passed, it became much more awkward to find an excuse to see him, and now she was forever thankful for the distance that existed between their houses, a twenty-minute stretch of dirt, not even a road, on the outskirts of town.

He didn’t even make the trek down it to see her, to demand why she had fled in the early hours of the morning, leaving not even a note behind. She knew that he must have been angry, furious that she had run when things between them had changed and there were days when she was thankful that he didn’t come down to see her, glad that she didn’t have to face him. But there were days when she did want to walk down and see him, to apologise for how things ended but she couldn’t. Not anymore.

It was far too late for that.

And besides, there were other things to worry about now, more important things on her mind such as her daughter that needed looking after, protecting from a world so cruel and heartless, one that would hurt her at the first chance that it had.

Her lips flickered up at the thought of her daughter, she couldn’t help it. Despite being only nineteen when she found out she was pregnant, nothing more than a kid herself, her, she wouldn’t change a thing about it. About her family. Though the pregnancy had been long and hard, full of worries that her own demons and past would come back to haunt them, Peggy arrived on time, a healthy bubbly baby who brought so much happiness and joy to everyone around her.

Though she was just a child, in a world that was too mature, too violent and full of hate, and Jemma just wished she could give her the life that she deserved, she made the days better. Pushed away at the darkness that lingered at the edges of them.

It made the days working here bearable, made the long hours and the horrific working conditions worth it.

Because if one person deserved a better life, out of all of them, it was her daughter, and she would be getting that.

That Jemma was sure of.

***

Back in the present, back in the club, she watched as Fitz pushed himself back from the table, abandoning his bottle of beer, and crossed the floor, pushing against the tide of people making their way towards the stage. A sigh escaped her as she watched his retreating figure, the lights darkening around her. She spun seconds after they did so, heading further backstage, no longer spying on him from the wings, ignoring the handful of notes that were scattered around her on the floor, wanting nothing more than to pick them up but knowing she couldn’t.

Knowing she wasn’t allowed.

It was Ward’s money, and depending on how well she did that night, depended on how much of a cut that she would get from it.

In the corridor leading to the dressing rooms, women hurried back and forth, running to find makeup and shoes and whatever else it was that they needed. Thankfully none of them spoke to her, a silent agreement between them all dictated they only spoke to each other when necessary so as not to face the wrath of Ward.

She was so close to her dressing room when she felt a strong hand grab her wrist, their fingers holding her in place. Taking a deep breath in, already knowing who was holding onto her, she spun and faced her boss.

“Grant.” The word was spat out and she glared at him, not even caring to grace him with a smile. “What a pleasant surprise. To what do I owe the pleasure?”

She spun to face him, his eyes cold and calculating as he scanned her face, then her body, working out her next move, what she might attempt next whilst also working out how best to stop her from disobeying him. How to make her follow his orders to maximise his profits. Because that’s all he cared about. How best to get the cash, and how to keep as much of it as possible. The ways were dirty, everyone knew that much. If he could, he wouldn’t pay his staff anything, only a few laws, slowly but surely crawling their way towards being outdated, ensuring that her, along with the other woman working there, got some money for their work. “Where do you think you’re going?”

“To get changed,” she replied, not meeting Ward’s gaze anymore, the fire that had been fuelling her extinguished, the fear of upsetting or angering him much stronger than the desire to stand up to him. He was too powerful, and she knew that even one wrong word could lose her this job. “If you’ll excuse me,” she pulled her arm from his loosened grip. “I need to get back to work.”

***

“Morning,” Daisy said, making breakfast as Jemma entered the kitchen, kicking her shoes off into the corner, before padding, barefoot, across the stone-cold tiles. “There’s pancakes for breakfast. Peggy wanted them.”

“Morning,” she replied, fighting back a yawn. It had been a long night, one that she hadn’t been expecting. Her head was pounding, and she was still coming down from everything, but she knew that she had to act like everything was okay. She always had to act like everything was okay, even when her whole world was falling apart because Peggy couldn’t know. Peggy could never know. “How is the little monkey?”

Peggy, who had been sitting at the kitchen table doodling, turned around in her seat and upon realising that her mother was back home, clambered down from it and ran into her mother’s outstretched arms. Jemma immediately lifted her up, spun once, holding her close. A gentle kiss was pressed to her daughter’s forehead and when she pulled back, Peggy beamed back at her mother, smiling a toothy grin with one of her front teeth missing. “I missed you. How was work?”

“It was fine sweetie,” she whispered, not wanting to say anything else, not wanting to go further into what she had experienced the night before, not even wanting to hint at what she had been through. “But how was your night. Where you a good girl for Daisy?”

Peggy nodded enthusiastically whilst Daisy confirmed that yes, she was the best girl. That she had slept through the entire night, not even waking once. Jemma’s eyes widened with each sentence, watching as her daughter nodded along, obviously proud of herself for being so good.

“Well,” Jemma teased. “Let’s have some breakfast and let mummy get changed, and then we can go and get some ice cream today? Go get ice cream and see if the ducks have come back?”

The young girl’s eyes widened at the mention of ducks. The two of them had discovered a small nest several months back, out behind the back of the local convince store, and every time they went there, Peggy demanded that they visit it. To see if the ducks came back, and even though more often than not the ducks weren’t there, to Peggy, it was still so exciting, a mystery that needed investigating. “We can see the ducks?”

Jemma nodded, setting her back down on the floor and rested her hands on her shoulder. “Do you want to help Daisy get set up for breakfast?”

But before anyone could speak, there was a pounding on the door, a non-stop incessant banging that told them that someone was there, and they had no intentions on leaving until someone answered the door.

“I’ll get it,” Jemma warned, her eyes heavy as she glared at Daisy. As careful as she was at her job, there were still those who found where she lived, demanding that she do some more work outside of her job description. Those who did never lasted long, Ward always finding out and disposing of them in whatever slimy way the henchman of the month preferred. “Keep her here.”

“Mummy?” The question from her daughter was ignored as Jemma padded back through the house, the fear of who was standing there demanding to be let in being far outweighed by the need to protect her daughter, but upon unlocking the door and pulling it open, she wasn’t expecting to see him there.

Leopold James Fitz.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the support on this one, I really loved reading your comments on chapter 1, I hope that you enjoyed this update!


	3. Love In My Eyes (Blinded By You)

It took her a moment to take him in, the fact that he was standing there, at her door, staring at her, his blue eyes sparkling in the dim light despite the anger that oh so clearly resided in them.

After all these years, he had finally come down to see her. And only after the club. After seeing her in the job she was now in.

It was so unlike who they were six years ago, two students, not even legally able to drink, celebrating finishing their end of year exams at the local college (a short-lived joy with the place closing down only weeks later, no one able to return and continue their studies), enjoying their lives.

Nothing more than two kids, in that stage between childhood and adulthood, where life was starting to get serious, but fun could still be had. It had been a huge group of them, some of that group no longer in the town, but they had separated early on, sneaking off to watch the stars before the neon glow of downtown blocked it out.

“_I love it. The stars,”_ she had whispered, watching as the lit up the sky one by one. “_Dad once taught me that you could make wishes on them. I always wished that I could be away from here, somewhere… somewhere better. I wished that my parents were better than they were, that Mum hadn’t run off.”_ She scoffed shaking her head. “_I should have known better than that. That wishes weren’t real. It was just another delusion that he had.”_

He had cast a glance. “_Your dad told you that?”_ He seemed confused, wondering why her father of all people had been telling her that. Because that man there, it wasn’t like the man that he knew, the man that Jemma’s father was known for being.

“_Before all that. Before he changed_,” she had clarified, not needing to expand on what had happened, just who her father was. Fitz, along with so many others, knew well enough who he was.

Then one thing had led to another, neither really sure who had started the kiss, and even after all these years, Jemma wasn’t sure who initiated the kiss, but neither of them complained, both of them slipping into it, taking their friendship further, crossing the boundary into something more.

And the next morning, she had been terrified, scared that she had overstepped some unspoken boundary, scared that she had hurt him. And the only thing that she had been able to think of was to flee.

Flee and keep what had happened a secret.

Until she had found out she was pregnant, even Daisy hadn’t known what had happened.

It had taken a lot of begging, but Daisy had kept what had happened a secret, and for all these years, no one knew who Peggy’s father was, and no one asked. To the town, it just wasn’t that interesting. Though extremely rare now, children were born, the fathers unknown.

And as for Fitz and Jemma, neither of them had faced each other, not until this morning here, when he had turned up unannounced at her front door.

“Fitz?” she asked, unable to keep the surprise out of her voice. “What are you doing here?” Stepping further out onto the porch that wrapped around the hose, the wood piercing her bare feet, and pulling the door shut behind her, she confronted him, wanting to know what he was doing here.

“What I am doing here?” By the tone of his voice, he seemed horrified by the fact that she was questioning him. “What am I doing here? I should be asking you what are you doing at the Hive Club? What you did all those years ago when you ran out! You didn’t even leave a note Jemma. I thought that you were my best friend! I thought that you_ loved_ me!”

His words were like a punch, multiple puncture wounds to her heart. Because he wasn’t wrong. She _had been_ his best friend, she _had_ loved him (in fact, somewhere buried deep down inside of her was still that emotion, it had never gone away, not really. There was still a faint ebb in her heart for her love for Fitz, it would never fade). “Fitz,” she began, the word a whisper, catching in her throat. “Please, let me explain.”

“Explain what Jemma? That all those years together… that they meant nothing to you? That I meant nothing to you?”

She shook her head, hugging herself. Tears were threatening to fall, she could feel the first ones already making an appearance. “I just… do you think that I wanted to run off? Fitz, we slept together, and there’s nothing about that night that I regret except running away but I was scared. Fitz, I had never done anything like that before. I had never had anyone who was more than a friend. And I was scared that I would… that I had ruined anything. Fitz, you don’t know how much you meant to me. But I messed up. What I did was wrong. But I didn’t want to lose you.” But what she didn’t say was her actions had caused her to lose her closest friend anyway.

That after that night, she had lost him.

“And running away was supposed to ensure that didn’t happen?” He shook his head. “No, it doesn’t work like that Jemma. What you did hurt me.”

“I know Fitz,” she told him, trying not to beg at her tone but it was one full of pleading anyway. “I know what I did was wrong, but please… please let me explain.” 

He stared at her, but when he spoke, it wasn’t the words that she was expecting. “Who’s that?” he asked, looking over her shoulder and Jemma spun, feeling her heart drop instantly. Peggy was there, staring at Fitz with equally as blue eyes that were just as wide as his.

“Mummy?” Peggy asked, clinging to the door as it rocked gently back and forth. “Who is that?”

Jemma froze and tried to think of something. “No one sweetie, someone from work. He’s going home now.” She shot Fitz a glare, and he backed off, knowing that confronting her now about what had happened all those years ago now, and why she had fled the way that she had would not be a good idea. Not when her daughter was there.

Looking away from him, she fussed over Peggy. “C’mon sweetie, let’s finish breakfast. Then we can get ready and go and then we can leave.”

Peggy nodded, allowing herself to be picked up with Jemma, snuggling close to her mum as she did so. And Jemma knew what she was doing, using her daughter once again so that she didn’t have to face him.

“You know where to find me,” he told her, his stare burning the back of her neck, and she knew, especially now that Fitz had seen Peggy, that she would have to deal with this. Talk about what had happened that night.

She turned back to face him but found that he was already heading back down the track to his house.

***

“You think that she’s your daughter?” Hunter asked, leaning back in his set, having set down his beer bottle. He had only been back home several hours, only stumbling in hours after Fitz had returned from confronting Jemma and went straight to bed. Not that had surprised Fitz.

Hunter had obviously stayed late at the club after Fitz told him that he was leaving, and when he hadn’t come home, Fitz could only presume that he had gone to Bobbi’s house after, staying there until he had to come back home. And when he did come home, he had gone straight to bed, leaving Fitz with very little to do except try and fix up the car with the new parts he had managed to scavenge the other day.

But he hadn’t made any progress, the image of Jemma’s daughter burnt into his mind. It was her soft brown curls, bouncing around her head as she swung against the door, how they looked so similar to how his had looked when had head been younger.

And she was young. No older than five or six if he had to guess.

The exact age that Jemma’s daughter, _their _daughter would be had evening the two of them slept together resulted in Jemma’s….

No… She couldn’t be.

It couldn’t have happened.

“Fitz?” Hunter’s voice issued around the house, and when he finally showed his face

“Jemma has a daughter.”

A frown passed over Hunter’s a face. “A daughter?”

Fitz nodded, finally meeting Hunter’s eyes. “Yeah, yeah she does.”

"Wanna talk about it?"

And he did, he explained everything, not missing out a single detail, and elaborating when Hunter asked for more. It took nearly an hour to discuss everything, to work out whether Peggy could potentially be his child, and although there was no way to be 100% certain until Jemma confirmed it, they came to the conclusion that Peggy _was_ his child. Out of all the information that they had, it was the only thing that made sense. And now, the next thing to wonder was in fact, what to do next.

“Tell her that know,” Hunter told him, leaning forward, his elbows on the table. “That she’s your daughter. Fitz, she’s _your_ kid too. You have as much a right to see her as Jemma does.”

He thought that through, Hunter’s words filling his mind. Only mere days ago, he had no family. It was just him and Hunter, the two of them against the world that they lived in (well, the days that Hunter actually came home). But now, now it seemed that he had a daughter.


	4. A Lover on the Left (A Sinner on the Right)

The days slowly turned into a week before Fitz finally made the trek back down to Jemma’s house. He had fantastical ideas about confronting her, demanding answers and receiving them, but when he found himself on her porch, his hand raised only halfway to the door, all the courage that he had had vanished.

Just the idea of barging into her life, demanding that he get to see her daughter, the one that might _not_ even be his… it just seemed wrong, but deep down he knew that he had to do this. He had to talk to Jemma about this. Even if the girl wasn’t his daughter, he had to ask her about what had happened. They had been best friends after all.

So, reaching up, he rapped on the door several times. There was no reply at first and he wondered if there was anyone in the house, but then he heard shouting. Jemma’s voice was obvious. And there was another voice, one that he didn’t recognise. He couldn’t hear what they were saying but moments later, someone was pulling open the door, yanking it open much harder than they should.

“What?” the woman at the door asked, an uninterested look on her face, and her arms crossed against her chest. She had a no-nonsense attitude, and it only made him slightly nervous. “What do you want?”

It took him a moment to put a name to her face but once he did, he realised that it was Daisy Johnson. She had been Jemma’s only other friend, the one that Jemma had lived with for the better part of a decade now.

“She’s my daughter, isn’t she?”

Daisy looked away for a moment, letting out a sigh. “Come in.” She pulled the door open further for him, and once he was inside, she slammed it shut behind her, making sure to not only lock the door but attach the chain to it.

The two of them walked in silence as they made the short journey to where it was that Jemma must be. The rest of the house was silent. No noise, no laughter, nothing. A dozen scenarios rushed through his mind as he tried to work out what was happening, but when he entered the living room, they all left him, none of them right. He had thought through so many things but what he wasn’t expecting was to find was Jemma curled up on the couch, a blanket draped over her, smoking something, what was most likely a condensed form of painkillers judging from the slightly sweet-smelling smoke that filled the room, something that was getting harder and harder to get. He just stared at her in shock wanting to know how this had happened. How things had gotten like this. “What?” he began asking. “What happened?”

“Nothing.” But from the way that she tried to reassure him he wasn’t convinced. And the groan of pain that came from her only verified that what she was smoking was painkillers, the substance doing nothing to ease the pain she was so obviously in. “I’m fine,” she begged but her tone convinced no one. “I promise you. I’m fine.” A pained smile crossed her face, but that didn’t help convince him, in fact, it did the opposite. It only confirmed to him that something was dreadfully wrong.

“It was Ward,” Daisy cut in, ignoring Jemma’s pleas not to. “She wasn’t earning as much as she usually did. It was a quiet night. He got aggressive. Pushed her against a door. She fell back, broke or fractured a few ribs, we’re not sure which.” A heavy frustrated sigh escaped her, as if this had been an argument they’ve been having constantly. Jemma shot her a look and the words that had been on her lips died away.

“But it was nothing,” Jemma cut in, desperate to convince him, and herself, that it _was_ nothing. “I’m fine. It’s just… you know what he’s like. He has a temper and I just happened to be on the receiving end.”

Her words, simply put, horrified him. How she was so calm, so causal about the abuse that Ward put her through only made him think that it was something that she was used to at this point. “Jemma.” He shook his head. “You’re not fine. You can be honest. Living this life, it’s killing you.” Daisy didn’t agree, but she didn’t disagree either, she just continued to focus her fiery gaze on Jemma.

“I have nothing else, okay!” She rose at this, a burst of adrenaline helping her to her feet. “This is all that I have, this is all that we have. I have to do this, for us. Do you think that I want to do this? That I want to work in the Hive club, one of the most dangerous parts of the town? I have to Fitz. I _have_ to so that my daughter has the best chance in life.”

“And what is Ward doing about this?” Fitz looked between the two women, who had shared a knowing look between them. “Is he helping? Is he doing anything? Is anyone in the club doing anything?”

Jemma snorted, shaking her head, and lowering herself back onto the sofa, reaching for lighter that had been abandoned on the coffee table. Daisy looked like she was going to protest but at the last moment, she changed her mind, only giving a subtle shake of her head instead. “As if,” Jemma muttered, lighting the cigarette once more and taking a drag. “Three nights off; last night, today then tomorrow, then I’ve got to go back.”

“Already?”

She nodded. “I have to. I have a daughter to look after. And I guess she’s why you’re here?” She stubbed the cigarette out in an ashtray on the coffee table, the thing forgotten now there were more important things on her mind.

He nodded, bouncing anxiously on his feet. He hadn’t expected the topic to be brought up that way, but he had to ask what was on his mind. “Is she… is she mine.”

“Yours? Yeah, yeah she’s yours.” It was a blunt statement, as if Jemma wasn’t even going to try and lie to him about it, hide the truth from him. But it still hit him hard.

He was a father.

He expected to be angry at that revelation, but he found that he couldn’t be. Jemma, she had been pushed to the brink. She was doing everything she could for her daughter, and to her, that still wasn’t enough. Collapsing into the armchair that was unoccupied, he watched Daisy go before asking the question that had been on his mind. “Why didn’t you tell me? I would have helped; I would have wanted to know.”

“Honestly, I was scared. Fitz, sleeping with you, it was the first time, the _only_ time that I have ever slept with someone. And after what happened, after that night, I was scared. Terrified that I had crossed some boundary. Scared that I hurt you and I didn’t know what to do. And with your mum passing away only weeks after, it felt wrong to intrude. So, I hid away, and I hid her. It was the only thing that I think to do.” Reaching up, she wiped at the tears that had begun to form, the first few making tracks down her face. “I suppose you have questions about her?”

A single nod of his head. He didn’t want to push matters, not when Jemma seemed so distressed, but he couldn’t help his curiosity. “Her name, I don’t even know her name yet.”

“Peggy. That’s her name. Well, her nickname. Her full name is Margaret Violet Simmons.”

“You… she has mum’s name?”

She nodded. “She was more of a mother to me than my own mother. She fed me, bathed me, took care of me when my own mother ran away and my own father was out doing whatever it was that he was doing. It only felt right, and after she passed those weeks after that night, I had to. I just wish that I told you.”

Fitz rose at this and came to sit beside her, wrapping his arm around her, allowing her to sob into his shoulder for several minutes. He remained silent as she did so, simply running a hand up and down her arm in an attempt to comfort her. Finally, she sat back up and wiped at her face. Swinging her attention to him, she apologised once more.

“I’m not angry. I… I get it. What you had to do. Why you did what you did. And I should have come down and seen you.”

“I think we both made mistakes.”

“Agreed but… can we put… not… can we agree that as we move forward, we’re more open? Can we start again?” He extended his hand out to her as a peace offering. 

Smiling at him, she shook his hand, knowing that the mistakes past couldn’t be changed, but they could be prevented in the future. “Jemma Simmons.”

“Leopold Fitz.” He couldn’t help the smile that tugged at his lips either, at such a simple gesture that meant so much, that could lead to so much.

“I suppose that you want to see her?”

“Is she here?” He looked around him, wondering if Daisy had gone to find Peggy to bring her here. He hadn’t seen, or even heard from her since he had arrived.

“She was out in the back garden, hunting for insects, when you arrived. I’ll go and explain who you are but…” A sigh. “Can you come back tomorrow? I need to talk to her about this all, prepare her for it. She doesn’t know much about you, about a father in general.”

He didn’t even need to think about what she was asking. “Of course,” he replied. His coming here, her opening up about everything, it would have been a lot for her, so waiting another day before being able to see her, see _Peggy_… well, he could do that.

“Thank you,” she whispered, and with a grunt of pain, rose to her feet. And with the words swimming through his mind, he watched her go, hobbling through the house before he rose himself and left, in the attempt to go home and get ready for all that was to come tomorrow.

***

“So she’s yours?” Hunter asked, passing Fitz a beer before collapsing on the sofa next to him, tilting his head “You’re a father?”

“I guess I am,” Fitz replied, unsure of what to do or say. Jemma had told him that he could come back the next day, come back and see Peggy once she had explained it all to her daughter. But now that he had time to think about it, the fear set in.

He was a father and he had so much catching up to do. He had only learnt that he was, in fact, a father today. It was a lot to take in. Quite a lot to take in. He still hadn’t fully processed it if he were going to be wholly honest with himself.

“Congrats mate.” Fitz wasn’t sure if the comment was supposed to be snarky, or it if was genuinely and it was just Hunter’s naturally sarcastic tone that gave it that vibe. “And Jemma? How’s she? Still as smitten with her as you were all those years ago?”

Fitz closed his eyes, not wanting to think about _that_ at this moment in time (because yes, Hunter was right. He did have a minor crush on Jemma Simmons, something that he had had for all these years, buried under the anger he had once held, but he couldn’t dwell on it at that moment. It wasn’t important) but Hunter realised that something was bad when Fitz didn’t snap or chastise him for the mention of the crush. “Fitz… what happened with Jemma?”

“It’s Ward. He… he broke her ribs.” Opening his eyes, he turned to look at Hunter, shaking his head as he did so. “The bastard broke her ribs. I need to get them out of here.” His mind began to race as he properly acknowledged what it was that he was thinking, as he tried to plan just what he could do to get them out. “I have too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the support and to everyone who recced it on aos rec week! I am so glad that you're enjoying this!


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